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Two weeks ago I was back in Las Vegas with my grandmother who was feeling better.  She and I were going to her immuno-therapy appointments from 9:30am to 5.30pm each day while the drugs she was hooked up to killed the cancer cells coursing through her body.  I was feeling angry about her having to deal with such a cruel disease at this point in her life.

My grandmother, however, was not angry.  She was her usual happy self.  She didn’t seem scared either. I told her one evening after her treatment that she was an incredible role model and in this time of her life, especially, she continued to be a person who showed others how to accept and graciously work through whatever they had been dealt.  Grandma was a little surprised by my declaration and said she didn’t know what she was doing that seemed so “special”.

Isn’t that something? She didn’t even see how “special” she is…perhaps that’s part of what makes her so wonderful.

When she walks into her oncologist’s office for treatment every single nurse says “hello”, which sometimes means a nurse has to go out of her way to find Grandma. They call her by name. They share a quip or funny story (most recently about the handsome paramedics who took Grandma to hospital by ambulance the last time she was in for treatment). Nurse Amy, in particular, likes to remind her, “there’s no chest compressions until the second date”. Grandma just laughs.

To be sure, she’s no saint and she wouldn’t want you to see her as one either. She complained once that her bottom hurt from sitting in the blue pleather chair she has had to be in for eight hours solid.  I did hear her pass a comment about the bruises developing on her left hand from the needles.  And, oh, yes, there was something about not being able to drive just yet. To be sure, she’s no saint.

Sometimes I think she likes us to think she’s a bit of a “dragon lady”, the nickname she was given when she worked many years ago for the government.  Truthfully, I have never seen that side of her and given how she charms the pants off every Tom, Dick and Harriet, I seriously wonder about the moniker.  She is serious, however, when it comes to tasks: never messing around when there’s something that needs to be done. I think that’s how she sees her treatment.  It’s just something that needs to be done.

And so she goes, day to day, with an attitude so positive, a smile on her face, a flower tucked behind one ear (her trademark style). She’s thankful for her life, her family and her friends. She doesn’t see herself as brave (that’s reserved for people who risk their lives to help others or protect their country). She’s just getting on with whatever is ahead of her.  True to form, she continues to show all of us how to walk through this terrifying experience with grace.

Do you have a “Grandma” in your life?  I don’t mean a grandparent, per se, but someone who, like my grandmother, is a role model without realising it. If so, maybe you’ll do as I’m doing now, count your blessings, learn the lessons they have to teach, and let him or her know just how much they mean to you. Go on.  Don’t wait. And, if you’re up to it, feel free to share your story.  I’d love to hear it.

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Cancer is on my mind a lot right now. My wonderful, vibrant, energetic grandmother has just been diagnosed with a somewhat rare form of the disease and is in stage four. She recently underwent chemotherapy and immunotherapy. The chemo sent her to the hospital for a month in September and then sent her, again, for four days this week. It has been awful.  Frightening, really.

Grandma’s cancer has meant our family has had to quickly get up to speed with the disease and how to treat it.  Her doctors have told us today they’re not looking for a cure: she’s 81.  They’re looking for a “management programme” that will allow her to live the longest (number of years, please God) in the best possible health. It sounds like a good plan.

While the doctors treat her with medicine, we, her family and friends, are treating her with love, support, laughter, healthy food and encouragement. On the latter front, grandma’s friend Laura M gave her a book called When You Need to Know Your Strength: Messages of Hope for People Living with Cancer, written by Melvina Young. It’s a wonderful gift to give and it’s a wonderful gift to receive.

The book is small.  It can be read in ten minutes.  It’s divided into four sections: 1) for when you need encouragement; 2) for when you need to know your strength; 3) for when it gets hard; and 4) for when you need to know you are loved.  Melvina wrote it after a relative and a couple of close friends were diagnosed with cancer.  In the prologue she writes, “I wanted desperately to offer words of encouragement and hope.  I wanted to express my love and support.  Instead, I found myself at a loss for what to say.” (Sounds familiar.) Melvina asked others for advice, listened well and offers us this little book to share with friends and loved ones who are battling their cancer.

I offer it as a gift idea for you.  May it help you bring comfort into the life of your friend or family member who has cancer.  When a day gets really bad, sit and read it aloud to them. Leave it in on a table so whomever visits may read it too. Doctors have medicinal therapy for fighting this disease…we have love and encouragement.  Together the combination is powerful.

Please keep my grandmother in your thoughts and prayers and let me know if you have someone who needs remembering too.

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Well, Dear Friends, it’s been a slow month for blogging. I’m sorry for not writing more often but it’s been a busy time for our family in so many ways.  I’m kicking-off today’s blog with the fact that our lovely little Irish family has moved to the mountains…the Rocky Mountains!  I know this really isn’t news to most of you because: (1) we are friends in Ireland and you know we’ve left or (2) we are friends in America and you know we’ve arrived.

But, if by chance, we are not yet friends (and you’ve stumbled upon this blog by chance) I want to let you know that for the coming year I’ll be reporting on what life is like for an Irish family living in America.

Aside from our settling into life in America, here are a few other things that have been on my mind this past month:

1. We left Ireland with four suitcases and four roller bags.  That’s one suitcase and one roller bag for each of us. Everything else we’ve left behind. Sure wish I had…oh forget it the list is endless.

2. The kids started school – that’s been a paperwork nightmare but it’s settled now. They ride a big yellow bus to and from school nearly every day…so American!

3. My grandmother was diagnosed with cancer this past summer and today I’m blogging from a hospital in Las Vegas, Nevada as we wait for her to start chemo therapy (an interesting story and possible upcoming blog).

4. I miss our organic kitchen garden in Ireland.  The apple trees were full of ripening fruit when we left. The roses were still blooming. The mint was growing prolifically along the hedge. It’s my little slice of heaven at home.

5. American news hasn’t a patch on Irish news…and the radio programs aren’t good either (except NPR).  Thank heavens for BBC satellite radio. When will RTE Radio One come?!

6. Where can I find Odlum’s Extra Coarse Wholemeal in the mountains?  I found it on foodireland.com but it costs $8.39 per bag and I have to order two bags and pay shipping for a total of $34.66. I want to make some brown soda bread.

7. Does anyone understand how to get the best medical insurance over here?!

What’s on your mind?

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Mixology.  Have you heard this term yet?  I must be living in the dark ages because, until recently, the only mixed-drink terms I used on a regular basis were “bartender” and “blender”.  Anyway, since coming to America, I’ve learned a thing or two about mixology.  For example, people on this side of the Atlantic host “mixology-themed” book club nights and mixology parties whereby a drink specialist is hired to craft new and exotic beverages and push out the limits on classic bartending. It’s a real American fascination.  Given that the Irish aren’t famous for their cocktails, I decided to jump taste buds first into the unknown whilst visiting San Francisco.  Our libation exploration lead us to The Slanted Door, a famous Vietnamese-inspired restaurant located in the Ferry Building Marketplace.  From the first sip I was quite literally hooked!

I like Mojitos (yes, it’s so yesterday, but, hey, I’ve been living in Ireland for 20+ years – give this girl a break!) so that’s what I ordered first.  It  was not sickening sweet nor was it gritty from the sugar. I believe our bartender used guarapo, sugar cane juice, which imparted a natural, less sweet, flavour. The mint was cool and refreshing and reminded me of the long, fresh stalks of mint growing in our organic garden back in Ireland. The muddling and stirring, both done at lighting speed, made the short wait from ordering to sipping a pleasurable experience.

My next drink was a Panama Orange Caipirinha (pronounced Kye-puh-reen-ah). It’s made with pixie tangerines, organic sugar, and Mae de Ouro Cachaca (a super-premium Brazilian white rum made in pots still using a 400 year old process and then laid down in oak barrels for at least one year before being bottled).  It was simply amazing. Seriously.  I’m not a big drinker.  In fact, I’m not much of drinker at all these days so to enjoy not one but two alcoholic beverages in the same place in the same night is remarkable.

I tried to get the recipe for both drinks from our bartender but was unsuccessful.  My advice is thus…the next time you’re visiting San Francisco call into The Slanted Door and don’t bother asking for a table but rather sit at the bar and enjoy the mixology and tasting experience for yourself.  You won’t be disappointed!

The Slanted Door is located at 1 Ferry Building, San Francisco, CA.  The phone number is 415-861-8032.  Their website is www.slanteddoor.com

Photo credit belongs to Mastermaq’s Photostream on Flickr – Thank you!

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For the past 48 hours I have been walking around San Francisco with my husband and feeling every bit like we were in Paris, France.  From our lunch at the Grand Café Brasserie & Bar on Taylor Street to the Picasso exhibit we toured at the de Young Museum, I could only marvel at the similarities of the two cities (wide streets, pollard trees, great shopping…”que dire de plus?” (French for “need I say more?”)).

As we left the de Young, I turned to my husband and asked, “doesn’t this feel like Paris?” Not yet feeling the vibe, he answered with a shrug, and we continued walking into the Golden Gate Park (which seemed to me to be like the Jardin de Luxembourg). It was only when we stopped at the Music Concourse to listen to a lone accordionist playing Midnight in Paris that my husband finally felt it.  Voila! So bowled over was my lovely Irish husband that he suggested we sit on two of the many white folding chairs before us and enjoy the moment.

Of course the magic got me thinking and, while he soaked up the atmosphere, I whipped out my trusty iPhone and googled “Is Paris like San Francisco?”. Sure enough, it seems, I’m not the only folles américaines (crazy American). San Francisco is not only twinned with Paris as sister-cities, it has often been called The Paris of the West.

In fact, in 1896, the mayor of San Francisco, James D. Phelan (the son of Irish immigrants) became interested in remaking San Francisco into a grand and modern version of Paris and is often credited with giving San Francisco its charming nickname. In 1915, Alma Spreckels, the wife of sugar magnate Adolph B. Spreckels, convinced her husband to recapture the beauty of the Palais de la Légion d’Honneur in Paris by building the Palace of the Legion of Honor in San Francisco’s Lincoln Park. The project was completed on Armistice Day 1924 and, in keeping with the wishes of the Spreckels, to “honor the dead while serving the living,” it was accepted by the city of San Francisco as a museum and was dedicated to the memory of the California men who lost their lives on the battlefields of France during World War I. And finally, in more modern times, San Francisco has been compared to Paris in terms of its gastronomy, its attitude towards gay life (think the Marais), the undeniable fact that it’s a “walking city”, and its multi-cultural diversity.

Unfortunately my husband and I are only able to spend two days getting to know this more unusual side of San Francisco but I have to say it’s been une expérience fantastique!

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The other morning, my lovely Irish husband and I dropped our two girls off to summer camp and flew four hours away to San Francisco.  As the plane taxied down the runway and climbed into the air I had an awful realization of what we were doing.  We were running away! Ok, maybe I was doing the running.  But for a moment, several in fact, I felt a sadness wash over me.

I’m not the kind of mom who gets rid of her kids for the sake of peace. They don’t go to boarding school, we don’t drop them with the in-laws for the weekend while we jet off to exciting places, and the only times they’ve slept away from home is when they’ve gone to a friend’s house for a sleepover. When my husband first brought up the idea of sending the girls to summer camp I hated it.  “No way. Not going to happen.” These were my immediate thoughts but as the weeks passed and the time got closer it seemed alright.

On arriving to the camp, the kids were excited to leave us.  Was this a good sign? Did it mean we’d done a good job raising them thus far and they were set to spread their tiny wings and flee the cozy Irish nest? Or, did it mean we are terrible parents and they’re happy to be leaving us?  Oh, the worries an Irish mom can press upon herself.  Whatever it says, when we kissed them goodbye and got into our rental car, I thought, “we can do this for 10 days”.

Ten days can be a long time. Then again, ten days can be just about right.  We spoke to the kids’ camp counselors this morning.  They’re having a great time. Our youngest is enjoying horseback riding and the freedom of being in a safe environ without her mom and dad peering over her anxiously.  Our oldest is enjoying windsurfing, which is not something we would have thought she’d be at all interested in, and she’s also bonded well with the girls in her cabin.  As for us, we’re good too.  In fact, we’re great. That horrible feeling I had as our plane took off was long gone by time the plane touched down in California.  San Francisco sans kids has been a good decision, it seems, for all of us.

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We travel a lot.  In fact, we’re in San Francisco now and have already left the sunny shores of Connecticut and the piney woods of Minnesota.  Because we’re on the go so much, I’ve gotten very cute (Irish slang for “smart”) about how and what to pack.  Friends have often said they “don’t know how I do it”, so, for the record, this is how.

The Luggage:

For starters, I usually take a large suitcase, a roller bag, and a carry-on tote for trips lasting more than a week (the children get one large suitcase shared between them and either a roller bag or backpack each for their personal items).  For shorter trips or weekends away, I can get by without the large suitcase.

The Clothes:

When it comes to clothes, I nearly always pack 1 pair of dressy jeans, 1 pair of black trousers, an easy-care dress that doesn’t wrinkle, 1 white shirt, 1 dressy tank top, 1 white t-shirt (long-sleeved in the winter and short-sleeved in the summer) and 1 black t-shirt, 1 long-sleeved jumper (Irish for “sweater”), 1 work-out outfit,  a nightgown for bedtime, underwear, sports socks, 1 pair of black kitten heels, 1 pair of leather runners (Irish for “tennis shoes” but in this case I actually mean something like a pair of “Keds”), a gold belt, a reversible black/brown belt, a pashmina, a small umbrella and a crushable hat (for either sun or rain protection). With these few items, I have seven complete outfits, clothes for exercising, and something to wear to bed.  The pashmina and the long-sleeved jumper change the look of my day and night outfits.

The Technique:

My packing technique is simple.  I put tissue paper between each folded item and place groups of things together inside a clear plastic garment bag (like you get from the dry cleaner) to prevent the clothes from wrinkling.

Resealable plastic bags are an absolute necessity.  The cords for all my electronics (mobile phone, laptop, camera, video camera) are packed in them, as is my makeup and toiletries.  Speaking of makeup and toiletries, because I don’t usually like hotel soaps, shampoos and conditioners, I always ask for or buy travel size bottles of the products I like and keep them especially for trips. Aveda has great travel-size products which smell wonderful. And, for my Irish friends, if you’re visiting America check out Target or the local chemist and you’ll usually a good selection of travel-size products to stock up on for future holidays.

The Accessories:

Other items that typically make it into my bags include a dual voltage hair dryer (unless I know the hotel or hostess we are visiting has one we may use), curling iron, pocket-size hair brush, sun glasses, jewelry (leaving the big or really good pieces at home), small purse in black or brown for day and nighttime use, and a small zippered bag for any unexpected purchases.

Surprisingly, everything mentioned fits neatly, albeit tightly, into my roller bag and carry-on tote and leaves me with just enough room for a magazine or book and a bottle of water (an absolute must for long haul flights).  And, one last packing tip, buy a carry-on tote that slips over the handle of your roller bag – your shoulders will thank you.  Bon voyage!

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Last month I took the whole family to see our dermatologist, Dr. Brigid O’Connell, who works out of Bon Secours Hospital and her private clinic in Fitzwilliam Square. Dr. O’Connell is a no-nonsense, straight-shooting woman with absolutely beautiful skin. We trust her implicitly.

After looking each one of us over from head-to-toe (literally), the good doctor’s advice was simple: wash with Cetaphil or Rowa’s Silcock Base (when our skin is feeling dry) and wear sunscreen every day. I repeat the later because it’s particularly important…“wear sunscreen every day”.

Ireland has one of the highest skin cancer rates in Europe.  In fact, according to the Irish Cancer Society it is the most common cancer in young people (aged 15-44) and there are over 8,000 new cases diagnosed every year. That’s a lot of unnecessary  worrying and suffering.

Protecting skin is simple. Wear sunscreen with SPF 15 for daily use and SPF 30 or more for times when you’ll be outside for prolonged periods (think beach, golf, tennis, gardening, and hiking).  Protection from UVA rays, which cause wrinkling and sagging, and UVB rays, which cause burning, is important too so make sure your sunscreen bottle offers both.  To stay sun-safe, always apply 30 minutes before going out and reapply every 2 hours or more often if swimming.

Thankfully our visit with Dr. O’Connell went well. If you haven’t seen a dermatologist lately, don’t wait.  Skin cancer is both preventable and, when caught early, curable.

Our family Favourites:
Bull Frog SPF50, Coppertone’s Water Babies SPF 45, Hamilton SPF 50 and Quadblock SPF 70, La Roche-Posay Anthelios SPF 30 and SPF 60, and SkinCeuticals Ultimate UV Defense SPF 30.  Most are available at Dr. O’Connell’s office, at your local chemist or online.

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Last Tuesday evening was just another night for most people but in our home it was “Spaghetti, S’mores, Sleepover” night. For hours I listened to five girls sing pop songs, laugh, share secrets, play dolls, jump on the trampoline, dine al fresco on the back patio and roast marshmallows (more like burn them to an eternal crisp) outdoors before they passed out with exhaustion in their respective beds. It was lovely, really.

Watching my youngest daughter and her “B.F.E.” (best friend ever) was probably the most fun. While they sat at our little red café table on the side patio, I watched them . At first they were talking and then laughing. Next, one of them snorted and the two of them started laughing so hard they nearly fell off their chairs. I thought to myself “I gotta get me some of that”.

And by “that” I mean “joy”. Life has gotten too damned serious lately. The simple pleasures of fresh air, music, laughter, pasta, a roaring fire and a good night’s sleep are being overshadowed by all the “debt”, “bailouts”, “foreclosures” and “loss” swirling around us. We need to reclaim our joy…remember how to throw our heads back and snort and laugh with abandon. “Spaghetti, S’mores, Sleepover” night may have been organized for the benefit of my daughters but, in the end, I had fun too.  Where do you find your happiness?

Spaghetti Sauce

(Serves 6)

4 tablespoon good olive oil

1 onion, chopped finely (1/2 cup)

garlic, minced, to taste (1 tablespoon)

1 kg of tinned tomato pieces in their liquid

handful of fresh basil

salt and pepper to taste

sugar to taste

Directions

1.Put all the ingredients into a big pot.

2.Simmer uncovered for about half an hour to an hour until it is reduced and concentrated by about one-third.

S’Mores

(Serves 5)

15 Marshmallows

One Packet of Rich’s Tea biscuit or Graham Crackers

Chocolate bars cut broken into small squares

Directions

1.Roast a marshmallow on a long stick over hot coals or a fire.

2. Place a chocolate square on top of one Rich’s Tea biscuit.

3. Next put the roasted marshmallow on top of the chocolate square.

4. Cover with a second Rich’s Tea biscuit and gently press the two biscuits together.

5. Wait a minute for the marshmallow to melt the chocolate and then eat.

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I love being in our kitchen.  It’s the command central of our home.  It’s where we entertain (despite the fact we have a beautiful dining room). When friends call-in, it’s the kitchen we instinctively head to for a cuppa and a chat. From our kitchen we can see a good bit of our back garden and the organic kitchen garden and the rose garden.  I can see our drying line out the window over the sink.  On warm days it’s comforting to see freshly laundered clothes gently blowing in the breeze.  Yes, our kitchen is a good place.

If there’s one thing that frustrates me about our kitchen, however, it’s having to do conversions.  By that I mean having to “convert” or” go back and forth” between American and Irish measurements and ingredients.  Depending on whether it’s an American recipe or an Irish one, I find myself sometimes having to whip out a book (or two) until I can find out how to convert or substitute one thing to or for another.  Take, for example, butter.  The American phrase “one stick” just doesn’t work in an Irish kitchen because “one stick” of Irish butter is larger than an American one.  Another example is “caster sugar“.  If you’re an American-in-the-kitchen, “caster sugar” means nothing (b.t.w., it’s “granulated sugar”).

After years of frustration, I finally created my own Conversion Chart which I am happy to share with you.  In our home it is taped to the inside of one of the kitchen cupboards for quick reference.  Hopefully you’ll find it helpful too.

Irish to American Conversions  

1 teaspoon = 1 teaspoon

1 tablespoon = 1 tablespoon

100g/4oz/8 tablespoons butter = 1 U.S. stick butter

15g butter = 1 tablespoon butter

225 ml/8oz = 1 cup liquid measure

1/2 pint = 1 cup liquid measure

110ml/4oz = 1/2 cup liquid measure

1 pint = 2 cups liquid measure

56ml/2oz = 1/4 cup liquid measure or 4 tablespoons

198g/7oz white sugar = 1 U.S. cup

198g/7oz brown sugar = 1 U.S. cup packed

124g/4.4oz all-purpose/plain flour = 1 U.S. cup

Oven Temperature Conversions

¼ gas mark = 110°c = 225°f

½ gas mark = 130°c = 250°f

1 gas mark = 140°c = 275°f

2 gas mark = 150°c = 300°f

3 gas mark = 170°c = 325°f

4 gas mark = 180°c = 350°f

5 gas mark = 190°c = 375°f

6 gas mark = 200°c = 400°f

7 gas mark = 220°c = 425°f

8 gas mark = 230°c = 450°f

9 gas mark = 240°c = 475°f

10 gas mark = 250°c = 500°f

Irish to American Substitutions

aubergine = eggplant

beetroot = beet

bicarbonate of soda = baking soda

coriander = cilantro

cornflour = cornstarch

courgette = zucchini

cling film = Saran wrap (plastic wrap)

caster sugar = granulated sugar, confectioners sugar

demerara sugar = light brown sugar

double cream = heavy cream

icing sugar = powdered sugar

mangetout = snow pea

muscovado sugar = dark brown sugar

plain flour = all-purpose flour

rocket = arugula

single cream = light cream

spring onions = scallions

strong white flour = unbleached flour

treacle = molasses

wholemeal flour = wholewheat flour

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